A Quest at the Mall

This all happened yesterday, but I was too sleepy to type this entire story out.

My mom needed to buy my cousin a birthday present, so I tagged along. That’s literally how this story starts. I was just bored at home, and felt like going outside. (I know, how crazy of me, right?)

This turned into a quest very quickly, as soon as we climbed onto the escalators. See, my mom got onto it, but these two aunties managed to get between us, and so I was behind them. So it’s my mom, then them- a granny, a mother, and a little kid- and then finally me.

The kid is like on drugs or something- he was insanely hyper!- and had obviously just had over a spoonful of sugar, and was jitterbugging around, jumping up and down, constantly in motion. Then, he falls, drags Mama down with them, down a few steps to where I was standing, and dammit, I got stabbed in the ankle by that evil auntie’s heel!! I got stabbed in the ankle by an auntie’s heels!! I was also pushed, cuz damn she had some momentum going for her, and nearly slipped down the escalator (it was going up.) but since I’d gripped the railing thingie just in time, I was safe. After we got off the escalator, I gave them at least a 7 meter radius, and walked around them to my mom. That auntie was evil =/

No joke, after the kid did all that, I was expecting at least an ‘I’m sorry”, SOME form of an apology, but no, she just scolded him playfully, with the most lyrical fake voice ever, to make it sound like she was the best mother ever, scolding her kid for misbehaving, right in public, cheers to her for being so reasonably disciplined, and all that. I mean, you could HEAR the smugness in her voice, like she was thrilled to be in the spotlight- her time to shine. Bleh, desperate for attention. Another thing- who goes, just for the heck of it, shopping in heels? If your out with friends, or it’s a date, and you want to look nice for and to impress the people you are going with fine, but if you’re going with your son that’s barely capable of putting one foot in front of the other- wait, that more aptly describes his clumsiness, not his age…since he wasn’t that young. Son that’s around six or seven? and your mother, who obviously doesn’t care about what color she’s wearing so long as it’s all warm? Are the heels really necessary then?

And then, on our way up to this store Breakout, I noticed for the first time ever who was at the mall. Usually, I just notice if there are a lot of people or not. I don’t bother to specify and notice- hey, there are loads of old people today, or something of that sort. But today I did, and there were waaayy too many kids for comfort.

And in Breakout, bam!, it’s full of little kids! It was terrible, I was trying reaaally hard to avoid them.

Oh, and don’t get me wrong, I don’t hate kids. Well, I don’t particularly like them either…I guess it’s like people, if I like them I do, but that doesn’t mean I like all those of that age group…something like that? It depends which kid, and I’ll give you an opinion. I might love one, hate another, and just find the other three boring. But otherwise, I don’t dislike all kids in general. Kind of neutral about it? But I do have a general they-should-get-lost-ew-why-are-they-here?! attitude towards most kids HERE. That’s cuz parents let them do whatever the SHIT they want to do. And this story will explain what I mean. Since I don’t just mean that the parents will toss them their iPhones and give them their own by the age of five, I mean- well, you’ll get it soon enough.

So I’m standing towards a corner of the store featuring the guys’ stuff, cuz I was helping my mom pick something out for my brother. We finally decided on this hoodie that was stripped. But we were arguing on the color. They had this blue an green stripped one, and a navy blue and yellow one. I found the yellow one cooler, and I think my Que has waaayy too much blue and green in his wardrobe as it is. But, as we stand there debating it out, there’s this mannequin right next to me. And this little girl trying to climb it. Yes, she was in fact trying to CLIMB it. And her dad’s like right there, and he doesn’t even bat an eye, until she along with the mannequin come tuuumbling down, and she just wriggles away, jumping towards the next closest mannequin, and tries to get to the top of that one. The mannequin, explodes into an assortment of limbs on impact with the ground, right next to where I’m standing, and I narrowly avoid being impaled with a pink plastic arm.

See? Forget parenting, there’s no CONTROL over these kids here, and by the time they get to something like five, they will be untamable BEASTS. Fear them, and run. That’s the best advise I can give. When forced in their company, be wary, very very wary. But don’t flinch or show any indication of anything other than happiness and rainbows- they smell fear!

And that was my adventure at the mall. Them kids were out to get me O.o

The War Against the Land King

just last night i had to dreams ( i woke up in the middle, after one ended and it sorta kind but didnt continue from there) you see, this story is after the first one. ill post the first one later, its actually romantic which my dreams never are, so heres one that is more a typical dream for me (actually, its not so typical either, cuz the moon didnt explode in this one! usually the moon, or something else behind me explodes in my dreams =P ) so anyways, lets start the story from the top. But this i do need to mention, that Ayesha and i did not know of the existence of the Two Romeos in this continuation, especially that they were in Florida with us.

Ayesha (one of my best friends) was sitting with me at this beautiful cafe. The birds were singing, the Sun was shinning through the green leaves of this beautiful, large majestic tree that towered above us, and we were eating ice cream and sipping iced tea and coffee (needless to say who had the coffee, eh? =P) We were laughing and having fun. Now, for some reason, ayesha was technologically more advanced than me since she had her cellphone with her, and it bzzzed, notifying her that she had gotten a text. Now, here, we dont know that Ammar and Adil are also in Florida with us on a vacation. Ammar had just texted her asking if she wanted to hangout. so she replies that, sorry dude, we cant, were chilling in florida, on a vacation. to which he replies, im here too with adil, wanna go to an aquarium? so we kinda have nothing better to do and say yeah, sure why not. So now we have plans.

Next scene: we’re at the aquarium. now adil and i are childhood friends (form the 3rd grade) and both are pokefanatics. so we see manta rays and explode into an argument about whether this particular species resemble mantyke or mantine. this debate quickly developes into a ‘do you even know which is which?’ argument. at this, ayesha and ammar (not die hard pokefreaks, sad i know =/ they totally wasted their childhoods..) start their own convo that i didnt hear, so i dont know what they were talking about. And we have looong arguments. so by this time, we have entered this one way tunnel where the walls are made of glass and contain all these fish, like this real one somewhere in Dubai, UAE. And now i notice that all the people ahead of us are kinda grouping towards the wall, as if making a path for us to walk through. so now i and co. halt in our tracks and stare ahead expectantly.

i dont know what dream-me was expecting but it certainly wasnt this. Maaz (Tariq, basketball jock) comes over, no, galloping over, while riding a seahorse. strangely, dream-me had no issue finding this weird. what i did find weird were everyones reactions to his arrival. Adil bursts out a ‘whatya doing here?!’ which i think is the most realistic, and exactly what i was thinking at that point but was too speechless to say. Ayesha is confused and is freaking out. also realistic. and ammar. ammar, shoves between adil and i (we were leading this wonderful rally), and pushing up his sleeve glances at his watch and growls ‘its about time!’. (hee hee, ammar growling). now im totally like O________o

Ammar starts ranting about they dont have ‘enough time to strategize and plan now’. this apparently makes loads of sense to ayesha, since she gasps the Ooooooh of understandment (its a thing now, get used to it. kinda like French the Llama.) and says ‘so thats why you called me over! to be the strategist. afterall, i am the only one here qualified to do it here, since im smart’. To which adil scoffs ‘more like a consultant. maybe, since im the smartest one here, and im the strategist.’ Now dream-me is pretty dumb, and justs watch ayesha blush at her baisty/burn and start an argument with adil which ammar plans out a new schedule( like Mr. Herriman would). So i go up to maaz and try to get him, Oh-Seahorse-Master to shed some light on this baffling series of events.

Here i feel compelled to mention his attire (and adils too, in a bit. it is always note worthy.).He is wearing this ginormous swirly seashell on his head, kinda like those shell fish ones, i think as a crown. hes wearing his glasses as usual, and then, at his hip, he had a fencing sword. ah, but not any fencing sword, one that was evidently crafted using KND technology. it had a handle that was either ivory or bone (not too sure about the difference there anyways =S) and the blade- wait for it- was made entirely out of toothpicks he Prince of the Sea himself. And, if youve seen the episode where no.3 has to save no.3 from that sand castle king of the beach dude/brat? well, remember the three ‘knights’ wo wore different types of sea themed armor? he wore clothes a bit like a mixed version of the purple one and the orange one, but more princely and entirely blue. in case you havent, and dont understand my Kids Next Door reference, heres a link to a picture; http://www.google.com.pk/imgres?hl=en&tbo=d&biw=1050&bih=629&tbm=isch&tbnid=LsVJCvewGxWKaM:&imgrefurl=http://knd.wikia.com/wiki/Knights_of_the_Round_Towel&docid=od-PIZ2xo8gRhM&imgurl=http://images2.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20100815215849/knd/images/e/ed/Knights_of_the_Round_Towel.jpg&w=431&h=290&ei=UC_nUN_AHbOM4gSVkYHABA&zoom=1&iact=hc&vpx=200&vpy=296&dur=3635&hovh=184&hovw=274&tx=149&ty=73&sig=110513296423729959206&page=1&tbnh=134&tbnw=222&start=0&ndsp=16&ved=1t:429,r:6,s:0,i:103 woooow, thats a long link. and just to clearify (and put this picture here too!) when i say Prince of the Sea, i dont mean King Sandy http://www.google.com.pk/imgres?hl=en&tbo=d&biw=1050&bih=629&tbm=isch&tbnid=1vY0xDgLIf_6xM:&imgrefurl=http://knd.wikia.com/wiki/King_Sandy&docid=rCQXesdA-4mGlM&imgurl=http://images4.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20091018003924/knd/images/e/e0/King_Sandy.jpg&w=640&h=480&ei=UC_nUN_AHbOM4gSVkYHABA&zoom=1&iact=hc&vpx=239&vpy=143&dur=518&hovh=170&hovw=227&tx=113&ty=121&sig=110513296423729959206&page=1&tbnh=155&tbnw=207&start=0&ndsp=16&ved=1t:429,r:1,s:0,i:88

And so my conversation with Sir Maaz…’hey whats going on??’ he decides to respond by pointing his blessed sword at my throat and says ‘ silence, infidel  or a shall be forced to silence you myself by beheading you!’ which seems very non-maaz-like and very knightly-outta-control-arrogant of him. so i give him one more chance before i just at him with my mad ninja skills. ‘maaz, whaaat is going on?’ this is the part where dream-me redeems herself by showing some signs of intelligence: ‘hey, you sound as if there’s a war coming up or somthing. are you going to war?’ i also thought ‘are you going to war dressed like that riding that??!‘ too but didnt say anything incase i was beheaded, you know. so he answers, ‘yes, i am declaring a war. against the Land King’. and he says this with closure, as if its climactic, dramatically, and with finality. i am now like, lost completely and forever.

i then am just like ‘yeaaaah, good luck with that..’ and it sorta ends. or atleast, i think the dream ends here. my dad interrupted me to drag me out to celebrate his wedding anniversary at 12.02 am. so my writing flow was interrupted and i dont remember what exactly it was i was supposed to / going to write after that bit about the clothes. hml…nope, still drawing a blank. grrr..

Oh yeah, and as per my dream rules, adil had to have had one of those curly-tipped french cartoon mustaches. (no offense to the French, you guys totally rule! =) ) and he was wearing regular jeans until maaz, prince of the sea, showed up. then, the jeans magically became red tights. *shudder*

now im gonna have a pretty hard time getting to sleep with that obscene image stuck in my head -.- oh well, another post sure to come, if im not entirely exhausted by then =)

Ciao~

FYI, on Dreams..

this here is my theory explaining why i have retarded, epic, awesome, funny, demented, silly, funny, stupid, pathetic, philosophical, impossible, shamabwahawaduh dreams. from what i can figure out, whenever my brain gets bored of my daily life and decides theres nothing interesting going on (no drama between friends, not having people i like come to drama society, being harassed by ppl i hate and find irritating/irksome/annoying/meddling, not studying in class, got no new material for my comics, etc) my brain makes up for it, by entertaining itself with these types of dreams. so yeah. my dreams are now going to be shared here. all sorts. so look forward to that. i actually had one last night and ill post it here in another post later.

actually, one of my dreams seemed just so random (for lack of a better term…) that one of my friends wanted to make a video out of it. sorry, but HOW exactly are you going to have the moon explode and me beat Bill Gates at poker in that, hmm? yeah, those were a few true spoilers =P so yeah, just wait and see! or in this case, wait for me to dream =)

We need to go deeper. yeaaaah, sorry about that, i just love that line from inception. and i use it whenever its not appropriate. such as now =P well, im my defense i was talking about dreams, k? =D